August 22, 2006

You sir, are no Abigail Van Buren.

Q. Why should I ask some ad hack for advice?
- Mike Phipps, Orlando

A. Advertising informs us that Tide® with Bleach will get those brown pit stains out of your tee-shirts and that Colgate Total® can stop bad breathe while fighting gingivitis.
So I can probably handle the rest of your problems too.