November 27, 2006

False advertising

Q. Can I sue someone for lying in their ads? I've been using Axe but not a single hot chick has thrown herself at me.

A.Yeah, you'd probably get your name in the paper for suing Unilever (makers of Axe.™) But a lawsuit won't help you get laid.
It's an accepted practice for ads to use hyperbole for entertainment value. So instead, let's pretend you asked me how to meet girls.
It took me years to figure this out, but the trick is to talk to them.
I don't mean hit on them. Just say hello, ask a question and be interested in what they have to say. Most girls will be so pleasantly surprised that a guy is actually talking to them like a human being, instead of trying to pick them up, that they won't even mind that you really are picking them up. It's very zen. The only times I had any luck was when I wasn't trying so hard.
It's called "confidence" and it doesn't come in an aerosol spray.
(But you'd be surprised how far showering everyday and doing laundry once in awhile will get you.)

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